7 Secrets to Becoming a Morning Person

Running low on motivation? Keep reading for 3 Mindset Hacks that are sure to set the wheels of change in motion on your motor scooter.

I don’t know if it’s just me but one of the seemingly hardest parts of adulting is all of the not sleeping. Being tired all the time sadly seems to be one of the universally accepted parts of adulthood. And, if you’re not a morning person by nature, getting up early can be one of the most agonizing parts of the day.

I should know. I’m one of those people who should absolutely be avoided pre-caffeine in the morning. I cannot think of anything worse than having to speak to another human the first hour that I’m awake. Like, literally-- don’t even look in my direction.

And because snapping at people for doing basic stuff, like breathing, is frowned upon-- I’ve had to figure out a way to make mornings easier for everyone. But mostly for myself. Here are my go-to tips for easing into the morning like sunshine.

Slide out of bed as soon as you wake up

Personally, I like to give myself 20 good minutes to luxuriate before actually getting up and moving so I can recall dreams and the like. But if I don’t want to risk falling back asleep, I will literally slide out of my bed and sit on the floor to think and let myself gradually wake up by sitting upright.

Take a shower

Nothing gets me going and washes away the sleep like a quick splash in the shower, especially if I have to wet my hair. Morning showers are my fave.

Listen to something uplifting or motivational

Feed your mind with positivity instead of mindlessly scrolling the ‘Gram or checking in on everyone else on FB. You can feed your brain while making your bed, in the shower or making the caffeinated beverage of your choice.

Replace your blaring alarm with something more soothing.

I haven’t used an alarm clock to wake me up in quite a few years. But when I did I had a great app called Sleep Cycle, that would wake me up at or before the appointed time when my body was experiencing a lighter sleep so I’d feel more refreshed. The app senses your movements in bed and calculates your sleep cycle accordingly. And my favorite part was the alarm tone was quite soothing.

Add something you enjoy and look forward to in your morning routine.

Whether it’s tip-toeing around your house before everyone else is up, or watching the sunrise with your green juice (ok, coffee), find something to love and look forward to in the morning that makes you excited to toss back the covers and get your day started. One of my fave motivations is breakfast. When I know I’ve got something good to look forward to I’m more excited to get moving in the morning.

No caffeine past 5-6 pm

You’d think this one would be a no brainer. But on more than one occasion I’ve found myself talking myself out of that last cup of yerba mate, or in the summer iced tea. Because the sun is staying up later, it seems more acceptable to have a casual cup of tea later in the evening. Then, the next thing you know, it’s 1 a.m. and I’m wide awake googling flight deals to anywhere but here.

Sleep train yourself to go to bed earlier.

There’s literally no substitute for adequate sleep. It’s like water or vegetables-- without it you’ll die. Like, not right away, of course. But you will start to resemble a sad little wilted flower. Droopy, with all of your best days behind you. Start pushing your bedtime up by 15-30 minutes a night to add time to whatever your standard bedtime is.

Similarly, if you want to get up earlier, try setting your alarm for 15-30 minutes sooner in the morning. It’s really important to keep the same (similar) schedule on the weekends, especially in the beginning so that you can keep up the momentum of early to bed, early to rise.

So, go ahead and put your phone down and get some sleep… goodness knows we could all use more or it.

Are you an early or late riser? Leave a comment here or on social.

Want to take back your mornings for greater productivity? Check out my FREE 3-day mini-course The Sacred Art of Being the F*ck Quiet. It's all about creating space and pockets of quiet in your life, starting in the morning-- or wherever you can grab it.

Solitude in our day is powerful. It's a space we can retreat to anytime we need to. And it's especially impactful in the mornings to give us the boost we need to create next level transformations in our life.

How To Throw A Beautiful, No-Stress Engagement Party On A Budget

So, little sister is getting married! And because she loves me the most-est, I’ve been appointed boss bish in charge, AKA the maid of honor. 

Now, I’ve been in my share of weddings I also happen to know this is the one role in the wedding party with thee MOST responsibility. MOHs plan damn near thing from dress coordination to the bachelorette party— and when it comes to nitty gritty details, I am the worst. I loooove to host events, but I despise the tactical orchestration. 

Thank goodness I have my cousin (who I’ve dubbed the Wedding Party CEO) to help work her organizational magic behind the scenes.

So, for our first magic trick, we had to put together the happy couple’s engagement party, with a little more than a month to plan it, and under a modest budget. So, the first 2 weeks, I was basically in panic mode— like, ‘OMG, I’m surely gonna f*ck this up and my sister is gonna be so disappointed (and pissed).’

And, then I got the bright idea to just pipe down and do what I’m good at and known for— a damn good happy hour! I am the happy hour queen. I LIVE for happy hour. So, all I had to do was look at this event as an opportunity to bring folks (ours and his) together for a few drinks in someplace low-key special with a beautiful ambiance.

And that’s when the vision started coming together…

So, if you have an event that you want to put together with a happy hour type of vibe that will make the guest(s) of honor feel super-special and loved, keep reading!

1. Think of the last time you went to a decent, poppin’ happy hour some place cute with dope decor and ambiance. Can you come up with 3 options? Write those down.

2. Figure out when/if those places are open before their typical happy hour starts (or gets busy). This is very important, because you don’t want to bring a large group to an over crowded bar where no one can get a drink, sit or chat. (Or maybe you do, but later, towards the end of your planned event once everyone is good and sauced and ready to dance—Idk). Either way, timing is everything.

3. If you can, visit your targeted bar, lounge, restaurant bar, or hotel lobby bar <—(excellent choice) around the time that you would want to have your shindig.

4. When you get there, ask the host/hostess when is the best time to come with a group. In my case, I fabricated a bit and said the fiancé wanted to pop the question and was looking for a way to do it low-key, but with friends and family around. I also mentioned that he was thinking of doing a champagne toast, and would the bar be able to accommodate something like that for about 20 people? *Notice these are all hypothetical, maybe/possibly scenarios that I was fishing with. Because for some reason, as soon a you mention wedding, people start to hear their register cha-ching and think they’re about to cash out at your expense.

In our case, I knew that the venue I had my eye on doesn’t do parties for large groups so, there wouldn’t be a need for reservations or deposits. We could basically show up and take it over (which we did).

5. Be sure to get the bar manager or catering manager’s name/card, as they will most likely be your point of contact to coordinate details like corkage fees, bringing cupcakes, etc. (they say it’s not a party without cake—but hey, it’s your thang! Do you).

6. After you’ve scouted locations you need to think things through based on what you observed and the strategic questions you asked when you visited. Like: Can the space accommodate the number of people you anticipate will show up (keep in mind roughly 15-30% will likely be a no-show), is it appropriate for children (as we had), how’s parking, will the elders be present, and if so, how you can secure seating for them, (if no one else)? Once you’ve done a little homework, you should be able to narrow down your location decision.

7. For me, the next step was to get the invites out as quickly as possible. We were at the 2 weeks until the showtime mark and I wanted to make things look official and classy. So, I threw up a mobile-friendly invite page using the online software, SplashThat. This is primarily a marketing tool, but it had all the bells and whistles I needed— mobile responsive (meaning, it looked good on the phone), it allowed me to collect info from RSVPs, and it looked beautiful. (It definitely helped that at my encouragement, my sister connected with a great photographer and had their engagement photos taken on the fly.) Also, by doing this step digitally, I didn’t have to worry about snail mail and it made it easy to share the link around to whomever they wanted to invite.

*Side note: The only “hiccup” I ran into 2 days prior was that the catering manage had not called me back to give me the deets on coordinating the champagne toast. But, that really wasn’t a biggie to me, since I knew that no bartender in their right mind would be unwilling to uncork a few bottles of bubbly to boost their sales (and tip quota) the day of. We weren’t expecting white glove service or anything. We just wanted enough to go around for each guest to participate in the toast. This was literally the ONLY party expense. And I know for a fact, bottle service was less that $400 for 25-26 people. And this was a VERY nice bar with a range of champagne options to choose from.

8. The day of the event, make sure that you and maybe a few close friends/co-host arrive early before any of your guests to scope out and secure prime seating. I nabbed the first table in the center of the bar as soon as I arrived (one of the reasons I chose this location is because I knew seating was 1st come, 1st serve). The groom’s family arrived right after me and grabbed the high top next to mines. As the guests filtered in, within an hour, we had all 4 of the center tables sewn up, plus seating off to the side for the kids. Most of our guests were milling about back and forth to the cash bar. Some ordered food, some were on the deck overlooking the bay, some were sitting at the bar next to our tables— everyone was within eye range, and all seemed to be having a good time. Not one person complained about service, food or drinks (which is a very good sign).  

9. Take plenty of pics (and video clips). As the hostess, I tried to make sure I got a photo of everyone in attendance so I could use the photos as a keepsake for my sister and her fiancé. I ended up making a video, and will likely reuse the pics for a printed album when it’s all over. 

10. Raise a glass to yourself, you did it! You pulled off a very litty engagement party happy hour!

That’s it! Tell me what you think of these tips in the comments or on social.

Want to take back your mornings for greater productivity? Check out my FREE 3-day mini-course The Sacred Art of Being the F*ck Quiet. It's all about creating space and pockets of quiet in your life, starting in the morning-- or wherever you can grab it.

Solitude in our day is powerful. It's a space we can retreat to anytime we need to. And it's especially impactful in the mornings to give us the boost we need to create next level transformations in our life.

Healing is Hard, Exhausting Work, Girl. But You Can Do It!

How to Balance Having a Social Life, Dating & Professional Productivity
Kiss & Grind Day 14: It’s Your Mid-Week/Month Check-In

Do you have an accountability partner in life? No, well... I'll be yours today. And here's a little story about why you need one, STAT:

Girl, I don’t know about you, but ‘I’s tied.’ 

I know we’ve all had weekends or vacations that were SO epic that we needed a vacation after our vacation. 

That’s the kind of birthday weekend I just had. I celebrated my 40th Solar return on Sunday, and it literally wore. me. out.

(Sidebar-- still, no kissing action though… but that’s another post. And anyways, my hopes are getting higher. This month is barely at the half.

I ain’t took no calls-- except for 2 clients.

I ain’t been outside.

I ain’t really posted on social.

I hardly had the energy to sit up at my desk to write.

A visual representation of how magical I felt this weekend.
Art by @Lady_Nefertitii

Before you come for me for neither kissing nor grinding, let me explain:

I’d completely forgot how healing work can cause you to feel all out of sorts afterwards. Even though my practitioner warned me ahead of time, I was still completely unprepared for the spiritual hangover that ensued. 

I was thinking I’d jump start my personal New Year with some major glow-up to let my aura bring all the boys and opportunity to the yard. So, I went and made all these plans filled with different energy work and healing modalities. I had a 90 minute reiki session on Saturday, followed by a 4 hour meditation hike on Sunday in the redwoods and several hours at the bathhouse getting my whole past, present and future body scrubbed and then kneaded like pretzel dough.

And yes… it felt amazing during the sessions. My physical body was as soft as a newborns bum after. Plus, I slept like a baby fresh out of my mom’s oven.

And then came Monday and it all came crashing down. I wanted to “push through,” I really did. But I literally could not.

Now, I’m not usually one to complain about Mondays. But when Tuesday crept around and I was still wasn’t feeling it-- I started  to get down on myself for you know, feeling tired from all the awesome I'd just experienced.

But then, these beautiful memes came to me from some extraordinary folks I follow on IG and made me feel so obviously seen, and well... human. 

That's the thing I love about social, it's always there to remind me that we're not alone in these earthly struggles. And that it’s completely okay if, at times, you only have the energy to be in this body. It really is. And as your accountability partner that’s exactly what I want to leave you with during this mid-month, mid-week Kiss & Grind check in. I want you to know, we ALL feel struggle in some way at one point or another.

It’s okay not to be be on the grind at all times. It's okay to not feel like superwoman everyday. It’s not even realistic to think that you can be “on” every single day. That’s how we burn ourselves out-- whether through pushing ourselves too hard, or in my case, foolishly underestimating the magnitude and time it takes to ground and re-center after a self-initiated healing.

The thing, is I KNOW this about energy work. The after effects are sometimes messy and can take a lot out of us so that it can be replaced and fortified with the strength and power that we need to live in our purpose and more fully. Bet no one has ever told you that.

And because I too, am working on practicing what I preach, I’m going to ask something of you. I want you to promise, right here and now that the next time you feel like you are at a critical breaking point and you can’t carry on, please stop and check in on yourself. Call, text your accountability partner. If you need to, you can email me!

Then ask yourself what you need to do for yourself to be alright in the moment?
Is it a quick cry in the bathroom? Is it to go home and binge watch Netflix? Take a walk? Scream?

What is it? 

Then give it to yourself.

How's your Kissing & Grinding going so far? Leave a comment below or on social. Click here and let's talk about your dreams and how you can live a more high-vibe, well-balanced life. 

Summer is hot and the nights are long, let's make the most of them download and print your copy of Kiss & Grind today! Get on this month's email list you'll not only get tips on how to kick-a** implementing this month's productivity suggestions, but some real a** girl talk, straight from you know who.

Want to take back your mornings for greater productivity? Check out my FREE 3-day mini-course The Sacred Art of Being the F*ck Quiet. It's all about creating space and pockets of quiet in your life, starting in the morning-- or wherever you can grab it.

Solitude in our day is powerful. It's a space we can retreat to anytime we need to. And it's especially impactful in the mornings to give us the boost we need to create next level transformations in our life.

How to Balance Having a Social Life, Dating & Professional Productivity

Hot August nights are upon us! It's my birthday month and idk about you, but I'm ready to let loose a bit. I had a dope reiki session with my boo, Fabulous & Grounded and one of the things that came up is that energetically, I've been putting out a real anti-social vibe lately.

As a busy entrepreneur, I often go waaayyy over board and become borderline obsessed with my work and business projects. And, I know plenty well, that's not conducive to meeting new people and having some much needed fun. That's why, for my birthday month, I'm making a better effort to not only stay busy grinding and hustling, but maybe I'll do a little kissing as well. Aaaand, in order to do that, thou must get active.

Hence, the theme of this month's calendar is Kiss & Grind. It's fully dedicated to making time for both, because life is about balance, right? RIGHT!

Now go ahead, download and print your copy today! Let's twerk sumthin' & have some fun in the sun while the days are long and the nights are sultry!! Also, when you get on this month's email list you'll not only get tips on how to kick-a** implementing this month's productivity suggestions, but I'll be sharing all the (hopefully) sordid details of my adventures in dating. Will Tea kiss again? Stay tuned... the drought maybe coming to an end!

How well do you balance being a professional boss babe and your personal life? Leave a comment below or on social. Click here and let's talk about your dreams and how you can live a more high-vibe life. 

 

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Want to take back your mornings for greater productivity? Check out my FREE 3-day mini-course The Sacred Art of Being the F*ck Quiet. It's all about creating space and pockets of quiet in your life, starting in the morning-- or wherever you can grab it.

Solitude in our day is powerful. It's a space we can retreat to anytime we need to. And it's especially impactful in the mornings to give us the boost we need to create next level transformations in our life.

Your Mercury Retrograde Mindset Upgrade

Who Can I Run To When Mercury is Retrograde? (Sings in Xscape melody)

Surrender my loves…  “What you resist persists.”

I follow a lot of dope astrologers on IG, which is how I came to learn and understand, over time, the influence of Mercury Retrograde. Also, I've done a lot of reading up on it online, and of course, studied people and their actions during Retrograde season. And let me tell you something… y’all… we tend to SHOW OUT in all of our crazy glory during these energy shifts.

During one particularly rough season, I was experiencing a very dark time in my family relationships and I. FLIPPED. OUT. That’s not to say that I wasn’t provoked. But what the experience showed me was that I needed to really do the internal, deep healing work in order to find resolution so that my spirit could feel at peace. ‘Cause ain’t nothing in the Universe random... I can honestly say this situation had been brewing under the surface for years, and the lid finally blew off. Thanks, Mercury!

And while the overwhelming majority of things I came across about Mercury Retrograde (both public perception and information) were negatively colored --you know broke down communication, turmoiled relationships, travel havoc, electronic malfunction, and basically feeling in a murderous rage. The Universal Law of Polarity informs us that on the flip side, there is no way a planet that represents so much power could not be useful to us, even-- ESPECIALLY in a Retrograde situation.

And, in the work that I do with NLP mindset coaching, I firmly believe that we shouldn’t cower away from opportunities to strengthen our resolve or resist facing lessons that Mercury (or anything else, for that matter) have to offer.

So, I pretty much changed the entire way I look at Mercury Retrogrades.

While I had an understanding of the energy of Mercury, I knew I needed practical ways to work with this force for good, and not against it.

From my studies of Hermeticism and psychology, and I knew that dealing with our shadow self (muahahaha… Come to the Darkside, Luke! *rubs hands like Birdman*) represented TREMENDOUS opportunities to self-reflect and grow. Hence, the birth of the Mercury Retrograde Mindset Upgrade checklist.

While I think it would be nearly impossible to retrace all of the steps and resources that I’ve read over the years that brought me to this “enlightenment,” I’ve curated a list of some of my favorite astrologers who I often go to when I want to read up on what’s shaking in the cosmos during times like these.

@ChaniNicholas “is an astrologer, healer, artist, activist, writer. [She forecasts] astrology for radical, political, critical mystics.

@MysticMamma “is an axis point of what's happening energetically in the cosmos…”

@SpiritDaughter “is an incredible astrologist, spiritual leader, writer, [and] intuitive mind.”

There are many, many other intuitives, tarot readers and the like who I connect with, but for the novice, this list is a good place to start. And, if you’re ready to learn how to harness all of Mercury’s might so that you can emerge like a phoenix with renewed vision for the next season and next steps forward in your life, I invite you to get your upgrade now.

Download your 8-page Mercury Retrograde Upgrade Checklist

Mercury is one of the most powerful cosmic tools we have to transform the very thoughts, ideas, and perceptions that guide and shape our lives. It’s true. And this checklist outlines some key ways you can actively use the retrograde influence to come out on top, like every time.

It's free to members of The Sassy Nation in the Creative Tribe Resource Library, and just .99¢ for non-members in the Gift Shoppe.